The Prank
by G-chan7
Summary: Malfoy's a real ass, we all know that. He just gets what he deserves when Ron and Harry decide to pull a very... unconventional prank on him. Harry's not so sure though, because, Merlin knows why,somewhere in the way he actually starts feeling something for the git. First fanfiction in this fandom! SLASH H/D rated M for language and future adult situations.
1. Prologue

Hello everyone! This is my first fanfiction in the Harry Potter fandom and in this site, so please don't throw knives at me or anything if you dislike... Moreover I don't live in an English speaking country so, if you find any grammar, vocabulary or punctuation mistake, feel free to let me know, since I have no beta at the moment.

This is SLASH as in boyxboy so, please, if it's not your cup of tea and it will never be, kindly, leave.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all its characters do not belong to me (sigh), they are property of J.K. Rowling. Writing this gave me a lot of satisfaction, but certainly not money.

* * *

Prologue

"Draco! Draco!"

Harry had been knocking on the hard, polished mahogany door for almost ten minutes now and his knuckles were starting to protest. "Open this door, dammit! At least let me explain! … Fuck."

"Language, Mr. Potter"

Oh. How could he have _forgotten_ her? Of course Narcissa was still standing there, maybe wondering why exactly _Harry Potter_, of all people, was in her house and currently trying to pull down the door of her son's bedroom.

When she spoke again her voice was, of course, extremely polite, but just as cold and threatening as her husband's had been. "Mr. Potter, could you please explain _why_ my son yesterday came home in tears, in the middle of the night?"

"How can you know he was in tears? You said it yourself: it was the middle of the night!"he remarked.

"Many middle-aged women suffer from insomnia, especially if they have seen and lived through what I have." Then, softly, almost in a whisper, she added "I had not seen him cry since the end of the war…"

Harry sighed. This was going to be difficult. Finally he nodded.

"Okay, I'll tell you everything, but we should talk somewhere more… private, I believe."

She raised a single, unbelieving, eyebrow, in the same way he had seen Draco do so many times… Draco…  
"All right" she said, snapping him out of his reverie "Please, follow me".

And follow he did, watching as the mother of his… lover? Friend? Fuck-buddy? Arch-enemy? -_'Draco'_ he thought _'just Draco'_ - led him through a magnificent candle-lit corridor (after all, could anything less than magnificent be worthy of Malfoy Manor?) to a refined, cosy little parlour, where she sat gracefully on one of the cream-colored armchairs.

"Please, Mr. Potter, take a sit" she said, seeing as he had not moved from the threshold.

A little depressed, Harry walked forwards and plopped down on the small couch beside her chair.

"So... is there something in particular you want to know?"

She just kept on observing him, in silence, frowning slightly.

"I guess I'll just start from the beginning then ... but you must promise me" he added quickly "that you won't skin me alive in the middle of my tale and that you'll let me get to the end safely, at least".

He smirked, a little flushed.

"You should know better than that, Mr. Potter" Narcissa said smiling in a dangerous, yet somehow motherly manner. "I would never do something as unrefined as skinning someone alive"

"Yeah, poison would be more your style, wouldn't it?" Harry whispered, thinking aloud.

"Excuse me?" But, despite the threatening tone of her voice, this time she looked sincerely amused.

"Never mind! Let's get to the story... well... it all began more or less a month ago, at the Ministry..."

* * *

And this is the end of the prologue... I hope it was interesting! I'm sorry it's so short but I'm not (and will never probably be) one for long chapters. I'm a terribly insecure writer so... reviews (of any kind) are loved if they help me to do better.

Next chapter features: angry/mischievous Ron, mention of a childish Draco and a quite amused (but still uncertain) Harry.


	2. Just a Prank

Hullo again! Since I had this ready from before I decided to publish it! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and its character, unfortunately... but J.K.R. did a splendid job with them, so I won't try and steal them away :)

* * *

Chapter 1.

_More or less a month ago, Ministry of Magic._

Ronald Weasley, 25, Auror, slammed open the door of the office he shared with Harry Potter, his partner and best friend, trembling with rage and shouting "The bloody little fucker!"

"Whoa! Chill, mate! What happened?" asked Harry, standing up from his chair and cautiously approaching him.

"You want to know what happened? Look at these" and, after saying that, Ron showed him what the other man had previously mistaken for a bunch of bright pink rags and which were, in fact, his Auror robes.

He really, really tried to restrain himself but he failed miserably, a deep laughter exploding in the room.

"Yeah, laugh, you backstabbing wanker!" exclaimed the ginger, grinning. "Any bets on who did this?"

"No need to. George's last visit was over a week ago, so it can't be him... let me guess... Malfoy?"

Ron groaned, nodding. "The bloody little fucker!"

"You've said this already, Ron" Harry smirked.

"Nah, did I?"

"Yup. So, what did you do to make him believe that your wardrobe needed some... modernizing?"

The young man shrugged, looking innocent. "Well... it's Malfoy. He's a childish, pratty, jerk, you know he is."

"So he just turned you robes" Harry laughed again "_pink_ for no reason?"

"You know, there could actually be a reason. But, bloody hell, if it was some kind of comeback for _that_ then the guy's really twisted!"

"Enlighten me?"

"Oh, well..." Ron threw the pink robes on his chair and sat on the desk. "You know that briefing I attended this morning about those new drugs coming from South Africa?"

Harry nodded. It was the one he had to skip because of the massive load of paperwork that he and his partner were always too lazy to do and which, that day, had threatened to swallow him whole.

Three weeks before four people had been found dead in an apartment in Wizarding London; the cause of the death was no spell known of and the victims did not have any wounds or bruises. So what had killed them? The answer arrived a few days later, along with two other corpses: a new wizarding drug. It was a mix of elixir to induce euphoria, strong invigoration draught, magic booster and painkilling potion; moreover, it was spiked with the essence of a south African medicinal plant, the _sutherlandia frutescens_, a powerful tonic, which, though, had done nothing to prevent the heart attack all the victims had died from, but had helped the Aurors to find a lead: for now the contacts with the South African Ministry and the lists of import-export were all they had.

So, as soon as the mystery substance was discovered, the Minister had decided to create a task-force of Aurors, International Magical Cooperation employees and potion experts, to find the dealers and stop its spread in England once and for all.

That day's meeting, updating them on the investigation South African Aurors were running, had been in the main office of the International Magical Cooperation Department, where, since a few years before, Malfoy had been working as an employee.

"And when I came in" continued Ron "I was a little late and there were no chairs left so I decided to sit on a desk – lots of people were doing it! – and I happened to sit on the ferret's desk... then I took my robes off – it was blazing hot! The little shit must have been angry because I forgot them there so he charmed them and threw' em in a bin. Really, that's just immature!"

Harry nodded. It sounded so absurd but at the same time so... Malfoy, though, that he had no trouble believing it. He shrugged. "That's what he's like, mate. What can we do, change him? No way. Just let him be, he'll get tired and stop eventually..." Even though, after three years of working in the same building as them he still hadn't gotten bored of the pranks he and Ron were continuously pulling on each other.

Ron's eyes, far from being resigned, were gleaming mischievously. "We could make him pay... I need you though." He said.

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing really bad, of course, just a prank, no one would even know!"

Harry smirked. It'd be fun and just like being at Hogwarts again.

"Elaborate".

"You still fancy blokes, right?"

Ah. That. A couple of years ago Harry had realized something that unsettled him, which was probably why he felt he wasn't completely satisfied with his life. A little fearful, he had (as gently as possible) broken up with Ginny and he had told her and his friends that he liked males. His ex-girlfriend was sad, of course, but didn't go into hysterics as he had anticipated: she just got up to him and asked, with tears in her eyes, if he really couldn't love her. He said yes.

Overall, his friends' reactions hadn't been bad at all, despite the initial surprise. Since that day, though, Ron and Hermione had been so supportive of his choice that they tried to set him up with literally so many people he couldn't even count. The question the other had asked was a sign he couldn't miss anymore.

"Positive" he said. Then laughing he added. "You're not trying to set me up with the ferret, are you?"

Ron snorted. "Merlin, mate, of course not! Wait... I mean, yes, I am!"

"What?" Ok, now Harry was creeped out.

"I mean, I am but not for real!" the ginger said, with the same 'isn't this obvious?' look that his wife, Hermione, had when she knew something they didn't.

"Oookay, I'm afraid I'm not following you anymore."

His best friend stood up from the desk and started pacing around the messy office.

"You see, I know for sure that Malfoy likes men too and..."

"Do you? And what do _I_ have to do with it?"

Ron looked piqued. "Could you at least let me finish? As for knowing he is gay... honestly, have you _seen _the guy? Anyway, he's always alone, either because he is a total prick (which, by the way I'm sure he is)" Harry chuckled "or because people still have reservation about the fact that he was a Death Eater but still he didn't get punished because of a certain hero..." and he looked pointedly at the other man "what matters is he could use some company".

"So what do you suggest I do?" asked Harry, now genuinely interested.

"Well you could... get to know him, go out with him... and once he likes you, you dump him and we tease him for like... ever!"

Harry glanced at him disbelievingly.

"What?" said Ron, his ears getting a bright shade of red. "I got the idea from a Muggle movie 'Mione forced me to see..."

"And, let me guess, did those two end up together in the end?"

"Yeah, but you won't, right?"

Harry looked uncertain. "Isn't that a tad too cruel?"

"Harry! Think about all the shit he put us through!"

So he did. He thought of all the times the git had put them in troubles, or made him and his friends feel inferior... "Okay, I'll do it. But there's not a chance he's even letting me near him, you know that?"

"No prob. I'll ask George if he can give me some of the love potion they sell at the shop..."

"Love Potion? No, Ron, I won't do it this way!" the other said.

"Oh, well... it's not really love potion, you know?" Ron added quickly. "It just makes people somewhat more... compliant. He won't jump you, if that's what you're afraid of. Eeew. I just got a mental image I really didn't want to see."

Harry still looked dubious. "I don't know, mate..."

"Oh, come on, man! Do it for me! I'm your best friend! It's just a prank and he's not even that bad looking, is he?"

Harry sighed. '_Not that bad looking'_ he thought. '_The understatement of the year. The guy's gorgeous... but he's such an ass!' _

"Ok" he said. "but not a word to Hermione, alright? She'd totally kill us if she found out..."

Ron smirked. "Leave it to me".

* * *

And now troubles are getting started! What will Harry do? How will Draco react? Guess you'll have to wait for a while to know: I have my final exams (last year of highschool's a bitch...) and I have no other chapters ready at the moment, but I'll do anything to update as soon as possible.

A big thank you to all those who read!

If anyone is interested I'm looking for a beta reader :) And remember, reviews make me _happy_!


	3. Conversations

Here's the brand new, just written new chapter!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and its character. As much as I try to convince myself of the opposite.

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Chapter 2

_Two days later, around noon…_

"Come on, George, I'm your brother!"

Ron had been alternatively shouting and begging for the best part of an hour.

As soon as he'd had a couple of free hours, he went to Weasley's Wizard Wheezes in Diagon Alley to get from his brother the only thing he and Harry still needed to put their plan into action: the love potion. So, he had strolled casually into the shop, entered the door of the staff's office, where his sibling was working on some paperwork, and asked him for some: the look on the older man's face was priceless.  
When he recovered from the initial surprise, he smirked and said: "Anything I should know, little brother? Problems with your wife? Because that is certainly not the best way to reso-"

"It's not for 'Mione" the younger Weasley answered. The other's eyes were, by now, as wide as saucers.

"Are you having an affair with another woman" he asked, worried.

"No, gosh, it's for Harry!"

"WHAT?"

After George's yell, Ron realized that he better explain his plan to his brother, before he passed out from shock; so he promptly did. Despite the twin's reputation for being a prankster, though, he flatly refused: not because it was Malfoy (Merlin knew the little prat deserved it!) but because love, he had learned, any kind of it, should always be a source of joy, and it was not supposed to be exploited to hurt someone, no matter how much of a jerk that person was. So his little brother had seemed to decide to annoy the hell out of him until he complied.

He would have probably endured it all if Ron hadn't suddenly shouted "You know, Fred would have given it to me, he would have found it funny and you would have to, before he died!"

George visibly darkened and stopped moving his papers around, to give his little brother a look half-way between anguished and dangerous. It was when his face suddenly became a mask devoid of all emotion that the younger man understood that mentioning the dead twin (and for such a trivial matter) had been a very bad idea.

"I'm so sorr-"

"Don't" said the other, in a low voice, interrupting him. "Just don't. You stay here, I'm going down in the basement to take the damn thing for you. I'll even disguise it into a different vial, so no one will understand what it is. Then get the fuck out."

He stormed outside, without giving Ron the time to say anything, and made his way through the crowded, colorful shop, the one he and his brother had invented and made famous.

'_So many laughing faces…'_ he thought '_Isn't this why we started our business, to make people laugh? And now I should use this stuff to help them hurting that poor bloke?' _

"Hey, George!" called his friend (and, lately, employee) Lee Jordan, from behind the counter. "You going in the basement?" could you take a box of trick wands, please? We're running out!"

'_Trick…' _He smiled. "Of course, Lee!"

He sped up and entered the basement; he localized a simple, empty vial, uncorked it and, waving his wand, he said "Aguamenti!" Then, a little happier, he started looking for a box of trick wands.

Ron was staring at a picture of the Weasley family before the war, hanging on the wall opposite the desk, when he heard the door opening and turned around to look at his brother with a pained expression. "George, really, I'm so sorry" he said "I shouldn't have said that, I know, I was a jerk... forgive me?"

George smiled and hugged him. "I managed to scare you off, then? Fred would have found _this_ funny!" he answered with a laugh, his voice wavering a bit. The younger pulled away to look at him in the eye. "So we're okay?"

"Yeah. Here, take your stuff. Use it carefully, though, 'cause I won't give you a drop more. It's transparent and it has no taste nor smell. It's quite easy to slip it into someone's drink, actually…"

Ron smirked. "Thanks, bro! See you, then!"

After he'd exited the office, the twin looked at the picture on the wall too. "Looks like we tricked him once again, eh, Freddie?"

_Meanwhile, at the Ministry…_

Harry was _hungry_. He'd been researching on ex Death Eaters and various criminals for hours, but no one seemed to correspond to the profiles of the dealers nor had ties with South African economy… While he waited for Ron to return from Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, he decided to go to the cafeteria, on the first level, to eat something. After a short walk through the Ministry's corridors, he entered the crowded elevator, with the occasional 'good afternoon' to the people he knew, answered by enthusiastic 'hello Harry's and 'good afternoon Auror Potter's, and reached his destination.

The cafeteria was a magically enlarged room that could accommodate almost all the employees at once: it was very large, airy and well lit by many enchanted windows. The tables, unlike Hogwarts' great hall, were many and had, seemingly no order; almost all the people, though, tended to stick with those who worked in the same department as them, creating vast 'Auror zones', 'Magical transportation zones' and such. At times it happened that someone decided to eat alone, so there was also an area full of little tables, taken up by only one wizard or witch. In that area, sitting alone with a big dossier in one hand, a cup of tea in the other, was Malfoy. When Harry saw the platinum blonde head, he was uncertain. Ron had not come back so he had no potion yet and it was unlikely he could approach the other. At last he thought: '_It's an occasion to try and get close to him without magic involved… if he turns me down I can still wait for Ron and follow the plan_.'

So, as swiftly as possible, he grabbed a tray and filled it with roast beef and mashed potatoes (he accurately avoided the plate of broccoli) and made a beeline for the ferret's table.

He stopped right in front of it still unsure about what to say. What could someone say a guy they'd spent more than a half of their life bickering with?

"Hi…Uhm… is that chair vacant?" he finally asked, with a forced little smile.

Malfoy, not even raising his eyes from the dossier he was attentively reading, answered with his usual, drawling voice: "I really don't understand, Potter, if you're being delirious and you're actually seeing someone taking it up or if your eyesight is so bad you can't see it for yourself."

"I was trying to be polite, you prat!"

"Well" he sneered "you just sounded stupid." Then he looked around and frowned. "There are a lot of vacant tables around, Scarhead, why would you want to sit here with _me_?"

"I thought you looked lonely."

The blonde, who had moved his gaze back to the files in his hand, looked up at him with wide eyes and a slightly agape mouth. When he had schooled his features back to an expressionless mask, he asked: "Come again?"

"I said that I thought you looked lonely." Harry repeated, smiling.

Malfoy, now, just seemed suspicious. "What's it to you? Why don't you go eating with your Weasel instead of bothering me?"

"Ron's not here right now."

"I see. Quick visit to brain-girl?"

"Don't call her names! Now, can I sit here or not?"

"No."

_Prat. _"Well, this stuff is heavy" Harry said, pointing at his food "so I'm sitting anyway." He put his tray on the small table and sat down, staring at the glaring blond, who, by now, looked definitely pissed.

"What's wrong with you?" Draco hissed.

"Nothing, actually. What about you? Has something happened or do you always have that stick up your ass?"

"You know what?" the other said, threateningly "I didn't want you to sit there, because I knew you'd start getting on my nerves. And as you can see" he continued, showing Harry his paperwork "I was trying to work. Because, guess what? Not everyone is the bloody Boy-Who-Lived-To-Make-My-Life-Hell: some of us actually have everything to prove!"

"Hey, I just asked you if I could eat at your table! It's you who started being a jerk and now you're whining, just as you always do!" the brunette almost shouted. Fortunately the room was noisy.

"Then you could do what everyone else has already done and fuck the hell off!" And, with that, he gathered his things and stormed off towards the elevators.

It was only after he'd already gone, that Harry processed the blonde's last words and realized just how utterly, terribly alone Draco Malfoy felt.

* * *

Sorry for the typos (they must be there, somewhere!) and the slight angst (especially the George/Ron/Fred part) but the characters just asked me to write this chapter like this! ;) I've tried to keep them all as in character as possible (George came out a little softer than I wanted him to, but, knowing that he has lost a brother, someone whom he loved very much, it's still understandable that he doesn't want people to suffer. Draco, instead… well a Malfoy who actually works in the first place? He must be pretty anxious about his job and I don't really see him going out with people much after the war…), but I'm not sure of the result. Let me know what you think!

Again thank you to all those who read and review!


	4. Plan

My apologies! This chapter came far, far later than I expected. It's almost Draco-less but you'll have plenty of him in the next. I hope you'll enjoy it!  
Disclaimer: Unfortunately Harry Potter and its characters do not belong to me...yet.

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Chapter 3

_Later, same day…_

Ron entered the office he shared with Harry only to find it empty. On his desk a note said: _"Grabbing something for lunch in the cafeteria. Back in ten minutes. Harry." _

So, while waiting for his best friend to return, he started to go through some of the files at hand, personal dossiers of previous offenders, trying to find a connection between them and the spread of the new drug. Most of them were, of course, former Death Eaters on the run, like Crabbe senior and both Goyles. _'Those guys' _he thought _'will never learn'_. Few of them, actually, had surrendered right after the final battle, seven years prior, and he still couldn't believe that Lucius Malfoy had been one of the firsts; maybe ol' Lucius had understood his mistakes, maybe he just did it to cleanse his family's name… anyway the results of this gesture had been not only a partial return of the Malfoys' respectability but also his premature death in Azkaban, under _'mysterious circumstances'_, shortly after his son had started to work at the ministry. "Which is kind of lucky, if you ask me" Ron had said to Harry, when news of it had appeared on the Prophet. "I know it's an awful thing to say, but the bastard tried to kill Ginny! And even if he hadn't imagine how much more 'My father will hear about this' or 'My father thinks' we could have had to endure!"

A soft clicking noise caused the young man's attention to shift towards the door from which his partner had just entered the room, making his way through the mess that covered desks, floor and any available surface.

"Finally you're back!" Harry said "You've been gone for ages!"

"Sorry, mate" the other replied "George was being difficult, but… guess what? I got it!" he grinned.

"Good. I just found out we'll really, really be needing it..."

"What do you mean?"

Harry started to describe, all the while nibbling on his bottom lip, his previous encounter with Malfoy: how he had approached him to try and work things out without using the potion and, more or less, how the prat had rejected him. For some unknown reason he didn't tell Ron how tense and sullen the other man had looked: he still felt uneasy just thinking about it, almost as if he had assisted to an unusual display if humanity he wasn't meant to –and didn't want to- see. _'He's still… just Malfoy, right?"_

When he stopped talking, Ron gave him a sympathetic slap on the shoulder and said "The stupid git… now we have the potion to make him pay, though! Unfortunately we have just one vial –George told me he wouldn't give me a drop more- so we'll have to rely on your…" he snorted "personal charms soon."

Harry mock-punched his arm with an indignant "Hey!" and they both ended up laughing like mad.

"So" continued the redhead, after his chuckles subsided, drying the little tears that had formed in the corners of his eyes from laughing too much "you think you can do it?"

The other man sighed. "Of course I can. Even if my being Harry Potter won't work with him I'm still one of the most wanted bachelors around and he's a vain shallow guy, right? He'll fall for me in less than two weeks… shouldn't be all that difficult dealing with him." Who knows why, then, his mind kept saying it would be all but easy?

"It's all right. Plan's officially started. Now help me with these" Ron said, pointing at the dossiers scattered around his desk "there's loads of them and my mind keeps slipping somewhere else every five minutes."

"Ok."

The silence, barely broken by the scratches of quills on paper and pages being turned, lasted no more than ten minutes before the ginger said "Hey, it's Friday today! You're coming for dinner with 'Mione and I, aren't you?"

* * *

_Three days later, around noon. _

Harry and Ron stepped out of the conference room of Magical Law Enforcement frustrated and definitely hungry.

"I'm starting to think we'll never catch those guys…" said Ron, looking slightly defeated "We've been looking anywhere but we have no leads at all! The only unusual component of the drug is the damn suthernalia plant…"

"Sutherlandia" corrected Harry, only half-listening to his friend's rant.

"What?"

"The plant's name is _sutherlandia frutescens_, it grows in South Africa and is a cardio-tonic" he recited diligently. Then, using his most convincing imitation of Hermione's voice he added "Honestly, Ronald! Robards mentioned it in a meeting _ages_ ago!"

The redhead chuckled. "Yeah, yeah I knew that… let's go grab something to eat at the cafeteria, I'm famished!"

Chattering the two men entered an extremely crowded elevator, whose doors barely closed pressing all the people inside one against the other. As soon as they arrived at the eighth level and the cold female voice announced "Level 8: Atrium, Cafeteria", Harry was suddenly thrust aside and squashed against a wall by a horde of ministry employees. In front of them, leading the group, he saw the one who had probably shoved him first: a young wizard almost as tall as he was, clad in smart-looking, dark-grey robes, with hair so blond it could be mistaken for white.  
He nudged Ron with the elbow and whispered "Malfoy's there!"

"Great! Let's follow him!"

Just as they had anticipated the blond was headed towards the cafeteria. Ron, putting a hand on his best friends shoulder, stopped him before he could enter and stayed on the threshold.  
Harry, at first, just stared at his friend, a mute question showing on his face, until realization dawned upon him. "Right…" he said. Then, lowering his voice he asked "The potion… do you have it with you?"

The other smirked mischievously. "Yep. But if there's something living with Hermione taught me is that, before doing anything, you always gotta have a good plan."

Harry looked over his shoulder: Malfoy was standing in line for a cup of coffee. "Okay" he replied "But, if he leaves, all the planning will be for nothing. So let's be quick."

"Mmm" Ron mumbled "How can we distract him enough that he won't see one of us pouring the stuff in his coffee?"

'Distract him, uh?' "I know! The cloak, my Invisibility Cloak!"

Being an Auror was a dangerous job: you could never know for sure when they would send you in the field and if you would need a quick escape route. That's why Harry had started to always carry it with him -even at the Ministry- just like Dumbledore had suggested nine years before.

"You're a genius!" Ron exclaimed. After thinking about it for a few seconds, though, he added. "Actually, you're not. It took you ages to come up with that, mate, and you're always carrying it around! Which is… kind of paranoid, anyway… it's good you have it now."

"Told you it's useful. So, I put it on and just... do it?"

"Nope. You stalked him for a whole year, back at Hogwarts... he could notice. I can... I don't know... bump into him or something. You can bet the prick will make a scene and you'll have a free hand." He smiled.

"Okay. Let's." Harry said and, after looking around to make sure no one would see, he took the cloak out of the inner pocket of his Auror robes and vanished underneath it.

Trying his best not to thread on anyone's feet, he followed Ron through the bright room full of chattering people towards the counter, where Malfoy, last in the queue, Styrofoam cup in one hand, wallet in the other, was about to pay. The ginger quickly grabbed a couple of sandwiches, then, seemingly thinking that bumping against him would have made the other wizard spill his coffee – since he was definitely taller and broader- he simply, nonchalantly, walked past him (all the while pointing at the blond's back to tell Harry to wait there) and showed the sandwiches to the old lady at the cash register.

Malfoy's eyes were wide in outrage. "Excuse me?!" he said, dangerously.

While Ron turned deliberately slowly and asked "What's up, ferret?" Harry uncorked the vial containing the potion and poured some in the cup.

"You know exactly what's wrong, Weasel! You jumped the damn queue!"

"Well don't think I don't know what you did the other day with my robes, you git!"

The invisible wizard shifted towards his best friend and tapped his shoulder to make him understand it was time to retreat.

"If you hadn't been such a careless, disrespectful oaf-"

"Whatever" the other retorted, interrupting him. The elderly witch at the counter was staring at them, worried, without uttering a word.

Ron handed her three Sickles with a smile and a "Have a good day, Lillian", then turned and walked away, leaving an irritated Malfoy behind. Harry followed him towards the elevators and got the cloak off.

"Mission complete" he said, winking.

"Good mate. I'll go eat upstairs. He's all yours" the redhead replied, then entered the elevator and pushed the 'up' button.

* * *

A writer who gets feedback is faster and happier! Let me know what you think and if you have any questions, I'll be happy to answer :)  
Also a big thank you to all those who read and reviewed. However, a review from a guest left me slightly perplexed. It said (and here I quote) "you better update this shit O.O"  
Well. You know who you are. Was it a positive review? A negative one? Honestly, bad words won't get you anywhere, please be clearer next time. I appreciate the gesture anyway.  
Until next time!


	5. You're a genius, Potter!

Forgive me. My lateness is unforgivable. Really. Hope I made your wait worth the while.  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter, its characters, and its locations and... whatever. It just doesn't belong to me, ok?  
SLASH!

* * *

Chapter 4

Harry entered the cafeteria again and spotted Malfoy sitting alone at the same table he'd taken three days before. He was holding his cup of coffee in one hand, while the other turned the pages of a voluminous dossier Harry hadn't seen ten minutes prior.

The Auror grabbed a tray and a portion of fish and chips then, stealing another glance at the blond to make sure he'd had at least a sip of the potion laced coffee, he headed for his table. _'Déjà vu' _he told himself _'Let's hope it won't end as badly as last time...'_

Stopping in front of the other man, he took a deep breath, mustered all his patience and asked "Since I can see for _myself_ that this chair is vacant, could I please sit here, if I promise not to bother you?"  
Malfoy sighed, eyes fixed on his papers, then gestured towards the chair. "Fine" he said "Whatever."

Harry sat, with a barely suppressed grin, and slowly started to eat: attempting to strike up a conversation would just piss the other off... he decided that he'd better wait, Malfoy's curiosity would have the better of him, eventually. Of course he was proved right merely minutes later.

"So" the blond started, still without looking at him "why are you here with me and not with your Wease- Wait. Merlin, have you used a time turner? This conversation sounds too much like the last one we had."

Harry laughed. "There are no time turners anymore" he explained "we broke them all when we were attacked by the Death Eaters in the Department of Mysteries in fifth year." He decided to keep the _'If I remember correctly your father was there too!' _for himself. Wouldn't be the best thing to say to win Malfoy over, really. "And, to answer your first question, I wanted to eat with Ron, but he just left, muttering something about you being a jerk."

This caused Malfoy to finally look at him, halfway between shocked and outraged. "What?! _He_ is the jerk! I'd been in a queue for ten minutes and he just walked past me as if I weren't even there!"

"Mmm" replied the young Auror. He took a bite of his fish and then he added "So maybe you're not to blame, after all... maybe he was just having a bad day."

"Damn right he was!"

"Well.. I apologize in his place, I'm sure he didn't mean it."

Malfoy looked at him disbelievingly, raising a single, blond eyebrow, as if uncertain if he was being made fun of or if the other had _finally_ lost his mind.

"What?" Harry asked "I don't want to fight with you anymore! I mean, what are we, still sixteen? Last time too... I came here just because I wanted some company that doesn't drool all over me because I'm Harry Potter and you looked... lonely..."  
The potion was definitely taking effect. Was the pink hue on Draco Malfoy's cheeks a blush?  
"... and somewhat brooding. Are you always working during your lunch break or is it a special occasion?"

The blond wizard let out an exasperated, yet amused, sigh. "So you're not pretending. You really _are_ this dense, aren't you?"  
Harry sent him a mock glare: after knowing him for so long, he could tell –and he was pleased to do so- that his tone was more teasing than actually mean. "Would you be so gracious as to tell me why would I be so terribly dense?"

"We are on the same special task force, Gryffindork! Why do you think I'm working so hard?"

"Ah, yeah..." _'Real smooth Harry'_ "so... you in International Magical Cooperation have any leads?"

Malfoy shrugged, gesturing towards his dossier. "I've been on import registers for more than a week and I've not found anything yet. It's frustrating! I know just about anything that's been imported by Portkey, Floo and any other magical method, but I still haven't found anything worth mentioning. The ingredient are fairly standard... the only one which stands out is the Sutherlandia Frutescens but no one has ordered it recently..."

His eyes came back to his register, while Harry stared at face. He was frowning in concentration and looking pensive and the black haired wizard thought that look suited him a lot; it was almost... endearing. Maybe there was more to Draco Malfoy than his bastard attitude, icy cold exterior and handsome figure _'and those striking eyes and those kissable lips...'_

He managed to get out of his reverie just when he heard an annoyed voice saying "Earth to Potter!"

'_Busted.' _

"Sorry, I was ..."

"Staring."

"No. I mean, not intentionally. I was... a little... never mind."

Malfoy, once again, looked at him as if he was sure he'd be going mad and starting to sing Celestina Warbeck's songs stark naked soon.

"All right. I just asked you if you could think of a reason we're not finding anything."

"Oh." Harry replied, running a hand through his already messy hair. "I really don't know. It's not like Muggle import-export registers that can easily be modified or not kept at all... Muggle criminals have many ways of eluding control, but I can't imagine how a wizard could..."

The other's face brightened immediately and his hand shot to cover Harry's, squeezing it. "You're a genius, Potter!"

"Am I?"

"Yes! Muggles!" Malfoy said, quickly finishing his coffee and gathering his things "How could _I _not think about it!"

He stood up and headed for the elevators, while Harry shouted playfully after him "Wasn't I the most dreadfully dense person you've ever met?"

Malfoy – Draco – smiled. A real smile, not his usual mocking grin or sneer. And it was beautiful. '_There is _definitely_ magic involved here'_.

"I take it back, Potter!"

* * *

When Harry came back in his office and was greeted by Ron he was still feeling a little giddy. Not only had he been successful with Malfoy –he'd held his hand for Merlin's sake! Just for a second and... because Harry had helped him doing his beloved job, but he'd held it anyway!- but more importantly because...

"We've got something, I think!"

Ron, who was still munching on his sandwiches, said something that sounded much like the cry of some enraged animal. Then after seeing the look of confusion on his best friend's face, clarified "Already? Is he that much of a slut?"

"No" the other replied "We don't have something in _that_ sense! It's about the case!"

"About the case?" the ginger asked "You talked about work?"

"At least we talked and we didn't scream at each other. We think the South African plant came through Muggle transportation, that's why we couldn't trace it!"

Ron frowned contemplatively. "That makes sense mate. Maybe we'll be able to find them now!"

Harry nodded. "I was thinking of talking with Robards. The meetings we have twice a week are not enough: the departments need to be more in contact with each other. I'll suggest that we work in pairs or something."

This time it was his friend's time to smirk. "And I think I know exactly what partner you'll ask for. This way we'll be able to keep on both the case and the plan! What's easier than falling in love while being together every day, looking for criminals? Harry, mate, you're a genius!"

Harry smiled. He realized, though, that this word -"genius"- spoken by Ron didn't even remotely make his stomach flip like it had when Malfoy had said it.

* * *

Hullo! To my faithful readers (and especially to my reviewers) thank you! To the new ones, welcome! (Starting A/N Dumbledore style)  
It's been ages since I last updated, but ... don't fear, I have every intention of finishing this fan fiction. U.U  
I've written down the plot (still in a broad outline, but I have nonetheless) so I hope I'll be quicker from now on. Unfortunately my inspiration is... unpredictable, at best.  
I'm still (and I'm starting to think things won't change...) without a beta. If you see any mistake feel free to point it out to me.

Let me know if you like "The Prank" this far!


	6. A family

Sorry, sorry, sorry. I know, it's been ages since I updated but I swear I've been buried in work (University turns sane people into total _maniacs_) and I've been actively battling writer's block. So, yes, this chapter took forever to write but I will get to the end of this fanfiction. I hate abandoning my stories, so no matter how long it will take I _will _end this :)  
Disclaimer: Harry Potter, its character and whatnot isn't mine. But I could make _so _much of it!

* * *

Chapter 5

_Later, same day..._

"… And that is why I think we should work more in contact with the other guys in the task force. All right, maybe not in large groups, that would probably just create more chaos…" Harry was saying, after having cornered Robards, the Head Auror, in a corridor.

"What do you mean Potter?"

"Well, for one even just assigning tasks would be a problem, communication and teamwork would end up being messy or would take too much time to organize and…"

"Ok, I understand, go on."

"I think working with the Potion experts would be a waste of time too, since we probably wouldn't understand a word they're saying: they're entirely on another level."  
Seeing Robards nod, serious, the younger wizard added "The best option would be working in couples made up of an Auror and an International Magical Cooperation employee: Malfoy and I managed to get a potentially essential lead in a matter of minutes, which means there wasn't enough contact between the departments from the beginning. Besides, we could have meetings three times a week to discuss what every couple has been up to and any news coming from the Potion Masters."

Robards scratched his chin, immersed in thoughts, then replied "It's a great idea, Potter, we're starting tomorrow! You may go home for today."

Harry smiled and braced himself for his exploit: the first part of the plan, convincing his boss to accept his proposal, had gone smoothly. His next move would be crucial.  
He made a show of walking away, then he turned back towards the Head Auror and asked "Sir? I was wondering if I could be paired with Draco Malfoy."

The older man stared at him interrogatively. "Why? I was under the impression that you two didn't like each other."

"Uh… we don't. Or at least we didn't at Hogwarts, but we've grown up and we've both changed a lot since then, so cooperation shouldn't be impossible… and despite any dislike we may feel, we work well together: he's got a quick mind, but I'm better at investigating. I think we kind of complement each other."

The Head Auror smirked arrogantly. "Of course you're better at investigating, that office's usual tasks are setting standards for cauldron thickness and shit like that!"

Harry chuckled. "Then, is it settled?"

"All right, Potter." said Robards, turning to walk away "But if I find you two bickering, turning your robes pink and such absurdities I'm putting you off the case!"

* * *

As soon as Harry had apparated on the landing that lead to his apartment, he sensed something was off. The newest wards he had put on his house alerted him, with a tugging sensation in his belly and a light blue shimmering around the front door, that someone was inside. More and more cautious, wondering just _who_ would wait for him in his flat, he tightened his hold on his wand and took out his keys.

He'd barely made a step, when his door suddenly opened, a bushy haired _something _bolted out of it and he found himself with his arms very full of one Hermione Granger.  
The shocked silence lasted about thirty seconds, barely enough for Harry to register the soft warmth of his childhood friend's body against his; then, detaching himself from her embrace, he snapped. "Hermione, are you barking _mad_? I'm an Auror, I could've killed you! Didn't you think it would be best if you had told me you'd visit?"

The woman gasped, surprised. Harry saw her slightly flushed face and her glistening eyes and immediately regretted his outburst. Funny how, after more than fourteen years, Hermione could still make him feel as guilty as a schoolboy who hadn't done homework for his favourite teacher. In a second, the tight grip he still had on her shoulder became a comforting squeeze. "Sorry for shouting, you just scared me, that's all. And yes, I know I'm a paranoid wanker, you don't need to tell me" he said with a smirk.

Hermione grimaced at the cursing, then took a deep breath. "No, you're right" she replied. "I should have owled you first, but I really needed to talk to you."

"'Mione, is everything okay?" Harry asked, worried.

"Yes, yes, just… let's get inside, mh?"

The two made their way into the Auror's apartment, and sat down on the worn but comfortable brown couch in the living room, while Harry spelled the tray on the glass coffee table in front of it to bring drinks and refreshments. Hermione took another deep breath and gulped down unceremoniously a glass of pumpkin juice; then she said "Harry, this may come as a bit of a shock… I mean, it shocked _me _and I should have certainly been the first to notice, wouldn't I…"

"Mione, you're babbling." She tended to that quite often, when she was nervous, he'd noticed. _'Merlin'_ he thought _'what if something is really wrong?'_  
He had but started to conjure up catastrophic scenarios, when the woman said with a tremulous voice "Harry, I'm pregnant."

"I'm sorry, _what_?"

If his friendly attitude and gestures of comfort hadn't managed to get her to relax, it seemed his gaping mouth and wide eyes finally did the trick, because she burst out laughing so hard she had tears in her eyes. When she finally stopped she looked much calmer and, smiling, she whispered "Ron and I are expecting a baby!"

Relief and a happiness so great he didn't think he could have ever felt washed over Harry, who stood up abruptly and hugged his friend tightly, saying "That's brilliant! I'm _so _happy for you! Why didn't Ron tell me?"

Hermione's sheepish look told him everything he needed to know.

"Oh. He doesn't know, does he?"

She made a tight-lipped sound. "Not yet. I just came back from my appointment at St. Mungo's and I was so confused… You were the first person who came into my mind. I mean, I don't know if I'm ready to be a parent and I knew Ron would just say that everything's all right and he would be overjoyed and-"

"What do you mean? Aren't you?"

"Of course I am. But I'm a little scared too. What if I can't be a good mother?" she asked, nibbling on her bottom lip.

Harry sighed and let out a short chuckle. Then he replied "Hermione, I've known you for fourteen years and, let me tell you, I don't know anyone who could be a better parent… after all you've spent all this time mothering Ron and I, how different can this be? Seriously. You're my best friend and a brilliant witch. I'm sure you'll do fine."

The witch smiled, a little teary. "Sorry again for the invasion, by the way. I left a note for Ron at home, telling him I would be here, so he's going to come through any moment. I was thinking of telling him here."

Harry laughed. "I can't wait to see his face! So, are you two having dinner with me?"

"If you don't have any other plans, yes." Her eyes gleamed mischievously, much like Ron's did. "Or maybe you do? Have you been seeing anyone lately?"

"Ehm… No?"  
Harry had accomplished many heroic deeds in his life. He had slayed a Basilisk, fought a dragon and killed the most powerful dark wizard of all time. However, he _still_ couldn't lie to Hermione Granger.

She beamed. "So you have! Tell me everything: what's his name?"

Thankfully, in that precise moment, Ron Apparated in the middle of the living room. "Hey Harry, 'Mione!" he greeted before moving to kiss his wife.  
No matter how cheesy it sounded, Harry never tired of seeing his best friends slipping into 'husband/wife' mode. The way they looked at each other, as if they were the only one in the room, made him, bachelor since _forever_, feel warm inside, more than if the love they shared were his.

"Well" Ron said. "Why did you call me here? The note said you had to tell me something."

Hermione bit again her lower lip, anxiously, shooting a quick glance at Harry. Then she replied "Maybe you should sit down."  
Hearing the way her voice shook Ron paled. "Is it bad? Merlin, you went to see the Healer today. Are you sick?"

The woman shook her head and her lips curled in a slow, large smile. "Ron, we're going to have a baby."

Ron's eyes widened almost comically before they rolled back into his head and he fell onto Harry's carpet with an audible '_thump'. _

* * *

And here's our last third of the Golden Trio :) Draco didn't appear in this chapter but he surely will in the next, so... stay tuned! And a review, even just a "Good", will be extremely appreciated!


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